Three Keys to Planning

The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance, but everyone who is hasty comes only to poverty.—Prov. 21:5

At the end of 2015, my life was a mess. We were about three years in with our adoption, and I was a wreck. I knew things needed to change in my life, but I had no clue how to even begin.

Everything was affected: my relationships, my work, my health. I was living on survival mode.

And I didn’t want another year like that.

My relationship with God was so low, I doubted I was a Christian. Yet I also knew that if I did not spend time with Him, I would pretty much guarantee I wouldn’t see any change.

So I packed the essentials and made the trek up to a favorite retreat center in the mountains. There, I spent three days of solitude and silence with the Lord to get a long view of where I was headed.

I don’t remember all the details, but that time away with the Lord was the turning point in my life. While there, I did three things:

·      Start with where I’m at.

I spent a lot of time trying different things with Anah because I refused to believe the new reality she brought into our lives. This was what was wearing me out. I had to concede that our adoption is going to be an ongoing sore spot in our lives from here on out.

A second reality I had to admit: trying to escape that pain will not lead to good ends. I realized that whenever I try to find my own solutions, I am simultaneously declaring that God had made a mistake in our lives by bringing her into our family. This forced me to face a third reality: my sinful heart and feelings of entitlement, pride, and rebellion.  

·      Thank God for where I’m at.

When you’re in a dark place, it is a discipline to find the glimmers of light. Yet, this hope is essential to move forward. I spent time looking for the evidences of His presence—for in Him alone is the way of hope.

I started by thanking Him for five things, then tried to find five more. Biblical truths that stand firm no matter what happens. Good things I forgot. Blessings in hard things. Eternal hope based on His ultimate control.

I continued my list, looking at every aspect of my life. Writing it out on paper visually reminded me of the great riches I had in Him.

·      Take small steps of service from where I’m at.

In difficult seasons, we naturally turn inward. We seek our own resources to find our own solutions. Our goal: to escape the pain we are in.

Ironically, when we are facing inward, we’ll only find dead ends. There is no escape. It is only when I began to turn my heart outward to God and then to others in service that my heart began to change.

I began by asking God to help me start taking the small and needed steps outward again: to my neglected husband, other children, and friends. This required planning because over the past few years, I had entrenched myself in some unhealthy patterns and habits. I needed the Lord to help me find the next step I can take, even if it is small, to help pave the way to other bigger steps.

As I write this, I am in a hotel room, doing these same three things, this time looking forward into 2022. It has taken a long time, but little by little, God has helped me to make steps forward. He is helping me get out of that pit.

I don’t think my reality is going to change. Nine years later and Anah is still largely the same. Sometimes worse in some places.

So I’m not going to say planning is the magic bullet or secret to a good life. But it is one thing that I’ve been doing that has reoriented me back to God and reenergized me to take the next step forward.

Taking time to plan has helped me not to try to escape anymore, but to make the most of the places where He has me now, even if it is hard. Despite the difficulty, He can make life beautiful. In that way, this time spent with God has led to abundance—not in more things or better life experiences—but in journeying with God in the midst of it.