What to Look For in Wise Counsel
A wise man is full of strength,
and a man of knowledge enhances his might,
for by wise guidance you can wage your war,
and in abundance of counselors there is victory.—Prov. 24:5-6
We live daily in the midst of spiritual battle. Maybe it’s not coming at us from the outside, but the battle still rages in our hearts.
For me, I struggle with pride and self-sufficiency. To deal with this besetting sin that threatens my identity in Christ, God blessed me with my daughter, Anah. Since she entered our family in 2012, God has used her special needs to refine and purge me.
To this day, I still face the fact that my pride is so deeply entrenched that it will take a lifetime to root out. I tried to do it myself but God made it clear I needed Him. I cannot generate the sheer will power to love.
Besides His indwelling Holy Spirit, God provided me flesh and blood saints, wise and knowledgeable people to guide and counsel me through the landmines of my own heart. There were friends I trusted. Then He also provided more formal mentors and counselors.
First, there was Jessica. Then there was Tim. And finally, Julie. All of them met me and my husband in the counseling room, not as a project to fix, but as a saint who was suffering with my situation and my sin.
Though none of them could take away my circumstances, they pointed me to God’s Word. When I was so consumed by anger, frustration, and pain that I could not see straight, their wise counsel in the midst of my own spiritual battle encouraged my heart and gave me a battle plan to work with. This is the wisdom Proverbs 24:5-6 talk about.
Wisdom’s Might
Tremper Longman III explains verse 5 is more literally translated “A wise person is better than a strong one, and a knowledgeable person is better than a powerful one.” What I needed was not more tips on adoption or special needs. I needed wisdom on how to bear this new responsibility without imploding and causing more destruction on my family. Most people didn’t understand.
That was how I got started meeting with Julie. She had the personal experience. She loved God. And she thoughtfully worked through life with a God-centered lens. She did not have the power to change my situation, but she certainly could help me navigate through it.
Thought it was costly, she helped me put God’s Word into practice. She provided the other set of eyes I needed to see my heart needs. And she gave me an alternate path towards life instead of destruction, wedding life and Scripture so I could walk faithfully towards God through the mess. This was better than sheer power!
Wisdom’s Plans
Proverbs 24:6 goes on to tell us how to win the war—with wise guidance. This is the plan before the battle. We need not just one voice but an “abundance of counselors” who work with you to devise a strategy.
Though they approached it from different angles, Jessica, Tim, and Julie essentially told me the same thing: I need to learn to view Anah not as God’s punishment but as an opportunity to grow in my sanctification.
I didn’t want to hear that, but hearing their separate but similar counsel helped me to remember that God was for me and that Anah was a gift. Renewing my mind instigated change in my approach. It tempered the frustration and anger in my heart. It led me to reconcile with my husband and children.
I wouldn’t have done these things if left to myself. But God used these wise counselors to help me discern God’s hand in the midst of a painful situation—and then helped me to practically walk through it in a (more) godly way.
Find the Right Counsel
As you wage your own war, it is critical therefore to find spiritually wise people who can help you devise a practical strategy to walk in His ways.
Are they of strong, godly character? Do they live out Scripture?
Do they help you orient life around God’s story?
Can they help you connect the dots from where you are?
Are they willing to help you face and deal with sin, not excuse it?
Do they remind you of the Gospel’s power for hope and change?
Can they help you grow in grace?
When temptations come, will they help you remember your commitment to Christ?
Do they help you come up with a practical plan of worship, Scripture meditation, and prayer that help you forge new patterns?
Can they guide you to worship God in the everyday challenges of marriage and family?
Right now, we live in a world opposed to us, with a body yet to be redeemed. That makes for some challenges!
But God has not left us alone. He is present with us, and He provides friends alongside us. When we immerse ourselves and integrate what we have learned into life, we won’t avoid war but will find victory as conquerors when we use what He has given us in Christ and one another (2 Cor. 10:4; Rom. 8:37).
