The Power of Retreat
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters.
He restores my soul.
He leads me in paths of righteousnes
for his name's sake.”—Ps. 23:1-3
As 2022 winds down, my husband and I will be entering not only a new year but a new era in our marriage: the beginning of our new ministry, OakHaven Ministries. Through this ministry, we hope to walk alongside, disciple, and train other leaders—from parents to pastors and their wives to missionaries to serving God through your work.
Part of the vision for this ministry was inspired by our own struggles as leaders.
We have gone through the struggles of juggling family and ministry. We have felt the pain of burnout. We have struggled with the jarring realization that who I am in public is not the same as who I am in private.
Through three specific areas—retreat, soul care, and training—we pray that God will use us to build up the Church. By caring for leaders who will return to serve their local congregations and neighborhoods, we hope to multiply our impact.
In working with leaders, whether formal or informal, we have found that the common denominator is a strong desire to love the Lord with their whole lives. Whether it be training up the next generation at home, discipling a younger sister at church, or doing Bible studies with seekers in your neighborhood, we are living out God’s great Story.
But all of us share one great question: How do we do it all?
My Secret and My Story
While planning better may be helpful, I’d like to suggest something even more foundational: setting time aside for intentional extended retreats with the Lord. This is my secret.
Like I shared already, I have known the pain of burnout in ministry.
Back when we were serving in campus ministry, 20 years ago, I was working part-time while being full-time mom to two children, homeschooling my school-age daughter, with a toddler in tow.
You know how it goes. Things were pretty simple at first.
But it quickly mushrooms. (And the kids start growing up too!)
I could not do it all, much as I tried. I kept powering through, but that resulted in not doing anything well. You relate?
I was trying to do spiritual work while living on spiritual starvation. I was not abiding in Christ, but living off leftovers. My own relationship with God was reduced to preparing for the next Bible study.
My relationship with God was all academic, not personal. I felt like such a fake. And sadly, my little ones bore the brunt of my snappishness and stress.
I knew something needed to change before I scarred my children and did irrevocable damage—presumably for the name of Christ!
It was in this situation where my husband suggested the unthinkable: go on a 3-day retreat.
What?!?!
I resisted at first but finally agreed because I had no better ideas. But it changed my life.
Three Benefits of Personal Retreat
From my very first retreat, I discovered three key benefits, highlighted in Psalm 23 as I follow my good Shepherd.
First, going on retreat allows God to reorient me.
Sometimes the best thing God does for us is to show us our sin. In fact, if you find yourself feeling convicted and guilty, count it as one of God’s graces.
I believe that our passion for God grows in tandem with our awareness of our need for Him. That often comes only when we see ourselves as we truly are, in all our posing, greed, pride, idolatry. Only then does the Gospel truly become good news.
Taking concentrated time to retreat with God reveals the truth of my heart and clears away the clutter that keeps us from appropriating the power of the Gospel and finding my deepest satisfaction in Him.
Second, going on retreat gives me God’s perspective by restoring my soul.
Philip Keller, in his book A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23, describes how sometimes sheep reclining on a hill can sometimes roll backward onto their backs—and then get stuck there, feet flailing in the air. If the shepherd is not paying attention, this desperate situation can turn deadly.
Likewise, when I go on retreat, it is like letting the Good Shepherd “flip me back over.”
After clearing away the gunk that blinds me, God then helps me to look afresh, evaluate, and remember what is most important in light of His great Story.
Third, going on retreat gives me space to let Him guide me in paths of righteousness.
I can have all the greatest intentions in the world but never get to them because I am always living on auto-pilot or high-alert mode.
To think creatively, to craft plans—all this requires time to pray, consider options, get actionable details down on paper. It is time to connect the dots.
Making time to go on retreat helps me to forge a new path that I might not otherwise see or take.
Debunking the Myth
While it seems like resting in retreat is doing nothing, I think it is actually harder work.
If you’re like me, it takes work not to work, to resist this ingrained self-reliance we all have. It requires effort to still the monkeys in our mind, reminding of all that has yet to be done. It takes courage to be still before the God of the universe.
Paradoxically, I think the time we need a retreat the most is when we are the most overwhelmed. It gives us a chance to press the reset button, to reorient with God so He can lead us aright.
In fact, I think intentionally planned and regular retreats are what gives your ministry, whether at home or otherwise, its vitality, its freshness. If the heart is the wellspring of life (Prov. 4:23), retreats help guard, nurture, and fill it so we can serve out of a full reservoir, not a dry well.
To lead with integrity, going on retreat is vital, not optional. We who teach others to follow Christ must do likewise.
Going on retreat will not earn us salvation. That is legalism.
Rather see it as an act of love, an expression of gratitude to the one who has saved us.
In sacrificing my time from doing good works to being with my good God, I gain something even greater—good character. When I get back to work, I carry this character with me into it. It is imbued into whatever I do.
What might going on retreat do for your ministry?
