The Fruit of Repentance
But that is not the way you learned Christ!— assuming that you have heard about him and were taught in him, as the truth is in Jesus, to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.—Eph. 4:20-24
Today, we’re finally going to talk about what we so often start with: outward change. It has taken us a long time to get here, hasn’t it?
But that may be the point. The outward appearance of change—treating others with kindness, holding your tongue, making efforts to communicate better—all these things might look the same.
However, what is different when we approach them from the heart is that these become responses of gratitude and obedience to God—godly fruit from a heart changed by the gospel, not merely self-help techniques that we strive to achieve by our own strength.
Let’s recap the pathway we have taken so far:
The core of our beings, the heart, is impacted by many factors: our physical bodies, the created world, other people. Even as believers, there is a spiritual battle for our hearts and who will have mastery—God or Satan.
The “heat” in our lives squeezes us and we respond. It reveals our truest beliefs, desires, and loves—God or others.
Our responses, the fruit, will be in keeping with the state of our hearts. We can produce rotten fruit when we act out of a heart bent on our own desires or when we pursue our own means of solving our own problems instead of God’s. By looking at how we respond to the pressures of life or to the people in our lives, we can trace backwards to look at the source of those thoughts, words and actions.
When we respond sinfully, though it may be directed at other people, the first person we are really offending is God. We commit sins that fall short of love. We fail to love and forgive or withhold good. We devise our own ways of getting out of our own problems instead of turning to Him in trust.
Because our responses have an ungodly root, they require repentance first to Him. When we confess our sin to Him, we restore our relationship with Him and reconnect to the Holy Spirit who helps us change.
Now we’re ready for action!
Godward Fruit: Worship and Trust
With hearts that are renewed and restored through the Gospel, we can begin to respond to God once again. Some responses of a new heart might include:
A new heart to worship God
A mind renewed with truth about who God is and who we are that prompts us to act in faith and trust
A new commitment to God as our master, removing ourselves from the throne of our lives
A new desire to glorify God instead of exalting ourselves or pleasing others at all cost
This is what I experienced when I recognized that my struggles (heat) with my daughter, Anah, were not really with her. They were really with God.
I was angry at God for putting her in my life. I had not wanted to adopt a child with disabilities, but here I was, responsible for her care. Her constant needs frustrated me and I was worn out.
I responded with many rotten fruits: anger towards others, neglect, the cold shoulder treatment to my husband, demanding requests to my other children, uncharitable thoughts towards Anah, hypocrisy at church. It was ugly.
When I was in public, I would paste on a smile but hide from conversations. But inside, I fed myself on self-pity and hatred.
What brought me into counseling was marital problems, but what God revealed to me was that my relational issues with my husband really were rooted in a distrust toward God and His sovereign purposes for me. I wrongly believed that my struggles were punishment, so I would beat myself up by throwing myself into my work in the home, in an effort to make my wrongs right by my own strength.
I learned that no, I was not crazy. Yes, my suffering is real. It truly is hard and it hurts.
But I have sinned too by relying on myself, trying to fix things my own way—and usually in hurtful ones towards others. In response to my pain, I became controlling and demanding.
By His grace, God revealed my blindness. I had thought that all my problems were out there when they were really in me.
Convicted to the heart, I confessed my desire to control my own life my way. I admitted I had an idol: me and my own comfort. I acknowledged to God how I have grieved Him by treating one of His own creations with contempt and pride.
At that moment, the Gospel came alive for me as I grasped that these sins cost me my relationship with God but Christ, in His love for me, has paid my debt. Despite my offense to God, His blood has covered over these sins so that I can stand before God, free from condemnation. What else could I do but praise Him?
Outward Fruit: Putting Off and Putting On
In our passage above (Eph. 4:20-24), it is interesting to note that while “putting off” and “putting on” are active voice verbs, “to be renewed” is in the passive voice. This perfectly describes what change looks like.
There is no way we can renew ourselves. We can try, but this is something that God does in us, not something we do by ourselves.
But this doesn’t mean that we are to be passive either. Flanked on either side of this transformation, we are to actively be involved in the process in two ways:
Putting off
This means that we are to actively shed that which is old in us, as we do at the end of the day before we put our pj’s on for bed. We can do this by:
refusing to dwell on things that are untrue, detrimental, or worrisome
holding our tongue on unnecessary comments
fighting temptations that we know will derail us
resisting the impulse to go into fix-it mode.
However, if you also notice, this passage isn’t just about things we aren’t supposed to do. If we only did this, we would only be living a life of avoiding evil.
No, change happens when we both put off and put on.
Putting on
For every thing I put on, there is something we can do. This is where repentance actually takes place. We commit to replacing the wrong thought, word, or action with something that will be in line with our renewed hearts:
meditating on all that Phil 4:8—what is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent and praiseworthy
speaking what builds up instead of tearing down (Eph. 4:29)
seeking God for His way of escape in temptation instead of trying to do it ourselves (1 Cor. 10:13)
crying out to God for His help and wisdom when we are stuck (James 1:5)
In my own life, as I began to grasp the power of the Gospel, a new resolve to honor God—a desire that was suppressed because of my other sinful desires controlled me—began to emerge.
Through the power of the Holy Spirit, gifted to me as a grace through the Gospel, God began to reshape my thinking and perspective on my daughter.
He began to help me start seeing her as a blessing, not a curse. This then began to soften my heart towards her and treat her with the love and dignity that befits a believer.
Towards my husband, I began to see my own sinful responses towards him. As I repented of my selfishness and pridefulness, God began to help me to start by seeking forgiveness for my wrong behaviors. Little by little, He helped me to find the good in the situation and focus on that instead of all the pain. This then began to shape the words that came out of my mouth and the way I treated him.
Not a Quick Fix
This is by no means a quick fix. I still slip back into my old ways. I still grumble and complain. Harsh words still come out of my mouth.
But the good news is this: when those things happen, I am quicker to repent (again). I am learning to turn faster to God for comfort instead of letting my bitterness grow. I seek reconciliation sooner than later.
I may not experience a 180-degree change, but these smaller repentances are still change nonetheless. Over time, I trust that they will be my default path instead of my old ones.
And that, I believe, is what real change is: it is not merely a change in behavior, but a change in our whole being and outlook. I begin to function differently from the heart level. Instead of merely trying to change behaviorally, God changes me from the inside out to bear authentically good fruit.
Where Do I Start?
After reconciling with God, we want to start praying about ways we can start living out our faith by the power of the Holy Spirit. One article from David Powlison, “Think Globally, Act Locally” really helped me.
Riffing off the environmental slogan, the idea is this. even as we remember that the overall goal is for us to become more like our Savior, we begin with the ordinary details of life. In this heat I am experiencing, how can I:
exercise patience at home with various family members?
carry out my work responsibilities with my eyes on Christ when the pressures are stressful?
love my aging parents this coming week?
In each of these, we are getting down to particular people, in particular times, in particular choice points. Identify where you tend to go south and then at that point, ask God for a new response to those situations.
This is what it looks like to become more like Christ in the moment. This is where change starts happening.
Most likely, these are going to be little things on a regular basis, not big monumental, life-altering changes. But just think: little changes faithfully practiced are more likely the opportunities we face each day. Very few of us will face the firing squad for our faith, but we will face small moments where we can choose to either die to self or fend for ourselves.
As we faithfully make these changes, God starts doing the transforming. New pathways, new tracks are laid in our hearts that reflect Him. Over time, these become firmed and strengthened to become the bedrock of a new character, a new way of thinking, speaking, and acting.
Where might the Gospel empower you to cooperate with God in His transforming work today?
